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Negotiating to get what you want and deserve Strategic Performance for Women Executives Kit Needham.

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Presentation on theme: "Negotiating to get what you want and deserve Strategic Performance for Women Executives Kit Needham."— Presentation transcript:

1 Negotiating to get what you want and deserve Strategic Performance for Women Executives Kit Needham

2 Four Barriers to Asking Recognizing opportunities to negotiate Entitlement Anxiety Social consequences

3 Negotiation Myths and Misconceptions My boss will promote me when I’m ready Salary or ___ isn’t negotiable in my organization I just have to make the best of it; there’s nothing I can do to change the situation I’m probably getting paid what I’m worth The recruiter says they don’t negotiate The economy is so weak it isn’t a good time to negotiate I don’t have any power to negotiate Good work is its own reward

4 1970--1977

5 1970-1977 Mary Tyler Moore was the only single working woman in a title role on TV Next came The Bionic Woman and Charlie's Angels

6 6 The most important step in the negotiation process is deciding to negotiate in the first place!

7 Negotiation: What is it? Negotiation: a process of potentially opportunistic interaction by which two or more parties, with some apparent conflict, seek to do better through jointly decided action than they could do otherwise. Negotiation: A tool to change the status quo

8 Locus of Control InternalExternal Internal vs External More likely to: Undertake activities to advance my interests Seek out information to advance my interests Be more assertive towards others “ I make things happen” “Things happen to me”

9 You can ask for this?

10 Costs of Not Negotiating First Job Offer robes to salaries and more...

11 Lost income is $568,000 Costs of Not Negotiating First Job Offer

12 Is $3.00 OK?

13 “ “I determine my own worth and it is up to me to make sure that my company pays me what I am worth.” 85% of men 15% of women

14 Who’s In Charge? Do you wait to see your raise or do you negotiate for it? Do you wait to be promoted or ask for it? Have you identified the next step you want to take in your career? Does your supervisor know what you want to do?

15 Make a Plan “Fail to plan and plan to fail” Planning for negotiation is the most important thing you can do to improve your negotiation outcome. Preparation gives you a tremendous amount of bargaining power

16 Planning Tool Kit Decide what you want. Know your priorities so you can pick your battles. Size up the situation. How many issues? Who’s involved? Underlying interests? Identify obstacles. Likely objections? Need new skills? Negotiation anxiety? Do your homework. Is the $ range reasonable? Salary surveys, internet, ask friends, colleagues

17 Planning Tool Kit Define the best possible alternative. Best that can happen if you don’t reach a negotiated settlement. Don’t wait until you are desperate. Waiting builds up resentment which backfires Establish a target or goal. Make it clear and ambitious, e.g. 7% raise or $10,000. (men w/ no goal did 2x better than women; gap closed to 30% for women with goal)

18 Planning Tool Kit Role play. Eases anxiety Ask for it. Be assertive. Women believe boss will move you along when ready but boss has many irons in the fire. Keep calm; have an emotional control plan. Take a break, ask to continue later. Win-win. Approach as a problem to be solved. Understand their perspective.

19 Planning Tool Kit Bounce back.  When negotiations fail, women blame themselves, men blame others.  Women credit luck for success, lack of merit for failures.  Women take ‘no’ for an answer. Men say ‘If you can’t meet my request, how close can you come’.

20 Components of your emotional management plan Have one!Have one! Identify and eliminate negative emotionsIdentify and eliminate negative emotions which inhibit creativity Alert yourself to the shadow negotiationAlert yourself to the shadow negotiation Anticipate resistance and role playAnticipate resistance and role play Have a plan to diffuse non-constructiveHave a plan to diffuse non-constructive emotions emotions

21 Negotiation Gym

22 How do I get in Shape? Practice, practice, practice Week 1: Start with the easy stuff Week 2: Negotiate at least 5 harder things Week 3: Ask for twice as much Week 4: Ask for 3 long shots Week 5: Ask for ‘too much’ Learn that ‘no’ is actually Okay

23 23 One Approach Lou Grant: You want a raise, is that it?Lou Grant Ted Baxter: Lou, I've written a figure on this pad. Ted Baxter Lou Grant: Ted, I've written two words on this pad. Lou Grant Ted Baxter: Lou, I think there's some room for negotiation between that figure and those words. Ted Baxter 23

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