1. Chapter 2 Section2 Principles of Human Services

2.  Friends: people who know, like, and trust each other ◦ Compliment one another’s positive traits ◦ Tactfully point out habits & attitudes that need to be changed  Friendship is a bond that forms between friends

3.  Type of friendship is determined by the bond between them  Acquaintance: someone you know, but who is not a close friend  Good Friends: share common interests, talk, have fun, enjoy social activities  Best Friends: share your deepest thoughts & feelings

4.  First step in meeting friends  Most of the people you meet are likely to be your age  Most of the people you meet are likely to be close to you (geographically)  Multicultural Society: people from many different cultures live in the same community

5.  You don’t form with everyone you meet  Likely to form with someone who has a personality similar to yours  Share with those who have a similar outlook in life  Share with people who have similar priorities  Develop with people who have common interests

6.  You don’t have to wait for someone to speak to you  You can speak to them first  Strangers are likely to strike up a conversation if you ◦ Show interest in them ◦ Focus on what they are saying ◦ Ask questions ◦ Provide feedback to keep the conversation moving ◦ Are open minded

7.  The same factors that attract people to friends also attract them to dating partners  While dating, you can actually learn about yourself  Helps learn about members of the opposite sex

8.  One of the first dating experiences  Group dating: a number of people of both sexes go out together  Each member has fun without feeling especially close to one person  “Hanging out”  Easy way to begin dating  No one feels on the spot

9.  Random Dating: also called casual dating allows people to date more than one person at a time  Not committed relationship  Allows for participants to grow socially and no one feels disloyal or jealous  Objectives are fun & entertainment

10.  Steady dating: agree to date only each other “going out”  Provides several types of security ◦ Someone likes you and cares for you ◦ Someone understands you and enjoys being with you ◦ You know who you will be spending your time with ◦ You have a date when you “need” one  Conflict occurs in all relationships and steady dating requires conflict resolution

11.  A person’s affection cannot be measured by any objective standards  Cannot be compared to a standard definition  Love has many different meanings  Involves caring more about your mate than yourself

12.  Infatuation: an intense feeling of admiration often confused with love  Often short lived  Infatuation is self centered  Love is unselfish

13.  Steady dating relationships usually means 2 people spend time together alone  Feelings of love develop  Want to express their affection (physically)  There may be pressure or desire for sexual relations  Sexual feelings are normal, but should be given a great deal of consideration

14.  If you know where you stand, you will be able to make a decision quickly (if necessary)  Some feel pressure to have sex when they are not ready  Strong emotions are tied to sexual relationships ◦ Shame, guild, used rather than loved ◦ Self-esteem may suffer  Physical consequences ◦ Sexually transmitted diseases (STD) ◦ Pregnancy

15.  Deciding to have a sexual relationship can affect the rest of your life.  If you make a careless choice, your health, your future may be jeopardized  You need to be able to make your own decisions and stick to them  Sexual abstinence: choice to refrain from sexual intercourse until marriage ◦ Religious reasons, moral reasons, fits personal priorities & standards, health, safety, personal integrity

16.  If you make the decision not to have sex, be prepared to follow through with your decision  Make sure your date knows your limitations  Avoid situations that may be difficult to handle  Do not spend time alone with each other  Stay away from parties where drugs or alcohol may be available

17.  Talk about your lives, hopes & dreams  Be there to listen  Write love letters & poems