1. ENGAGEMENT Will you prepare more for the wedding day or for the married life together? Sugar bucket

2. Formula for Marital Success  You have dated for 4 seasons and continue to date each other  You care about one another.  Both are responsible, mature, and independent  You respect each other – not everyone is perfect  You can assertively communicate your feelings and needs  You love yourself as well as each other  You have a balanced individual and joint leisure time  Both are established in a job or career  Both know and accept yourselves  You satisfy each other’s needs and are not selfish  You have realistic expectations about the challenges of marriage  You can resolve conflicts well together  You feel good about the personality of your partner  You agree on religious and ethical values  There is an equal role relationship  You know that love is NOT enough  You are committed to the marriage and to your partner. If you can do these things well before marriage, studies of happy couples have shown the likelihood of your doing them well after marriage is high. So now you…..

3. GET ENGAGED! What Makes the Engagement Official?...  Announcement to the Family  The Engagement Ring Which is easier to get a drivers license or a marriage license?

4. Purposes of Engagement… 1. Show commitment to each other 2. Plan a wedding 3. Make sure it is really what you want to do by testing and evaluating the relationship 4. Make sure that you really do know each other 5. To discuss and come to agreement on important topics Engagement is Mate Selection Insurance Do you know your future spouse as well as you know your sugar intake?

5. All to often:  Couples spend more time preparing for the wedding which lasts for a day than for the married life, which is intended to last a lifetime.  Getting married and staying married are 2 different things.  More focus is placed on the getting than on the staying which is why the divorce rate is so high.  Many believe that LOVE will lead the way or that love will get us through.  Almost everyone that gets married is “in love”, but half of these lovebirds get a divorce. Love is NOT enough.

6. Important Topics to Discuss During Engagement… 1. Role responsibilities and expectations 2. Relationship with family members and friends 3. Communication and Conflict Management methods 4. Relationship expectations: Love, commitment, and the Sexual relationship 5. Feelings about parenting and Children: how many, how to discipline 6. Recreation activities (pets) 7. Money and who manages it 8. Religion 9. Jobs and careers Points of Discussion

7. Marriage Ceremony You have 5 minutes to get set up and be ready to go. Music group get the music going Decoration group -decorate Refreshments and Cake get set out Wedding party get into places (bride, groom, father of bride, Best man, flower girl, maid of honor, bridesmaids, Justice of the peace, ring bearer) Photographers

8. Father of the Bride Wedding (scene17) Watch video clip and Eat refreshments and cake. Judge cakes (if having a contest) How much did that wedding cost? Bridesmaid dresses (4) $800Cake $1200 Mother’s Dresses (2) $400Invitations (500) $300 Flower girl dresses (2) $200Bride Dress $1200 Tuxes (8) $800Reception flower $700 Plane tickets for relatives $1500 x 9 = $13,500Food ($250 head) $125,000 Rings $3000Band $500 Wedding Coordinator $3000Decoration and remodel $50,000 Swans $150Valet Parking $600 Church $200Limo $500 Pictures $2000Honeymoon $5,000 $209,050

9. PLAN A HONEYMOON Spend only the amount on the money card

10. The Honeymoon Should Provide…  Rest and relaxation from the wedding  Time to be alone together  Recreation and fun  Adjustment to marriage

11. Honeymoon Planning Guidelines A nationwide survey showed that 50% of couples reported that their honeymoon was not happy at all!!! 1. Make it within a budget Don’t begin your marriage in debt. 2. Have realistic expectations Honeymoons have become overglamorized and end up being a big disappointment. This is also a time for disillusioning. The couple begins to see each other as real people with real faults. 3. Have a sense of humor and create fun memories Part 2 on Honeymoon plan