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Conciseness Preciseness Effectiveness How to say more with fewer words.

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Presentation on theme: "Conciseness Preciseness Effectiveness How to say more with fewer words."— Presentation transcript:

1 Conciseness Preciseness Effectiveness How to say more with fewer words

2 The information in this presentation is from the Purdue University Online Writing Lab The information in this presentation is from the Purdue University Online Writing Lab Effective writing Effective writing is concise, with no unnecessary words. The term "wordy“ refers to writing that includes unnecessary words. "Wordiness" refers to the use of unnecessary words to express ideas that can be expressed with fewer words. A sentence can be long and concise. Note that a sentence is not "wordy" just because it is long. A sentence can be long and concise. Nor is a paragraph or an essay necessarily wordy just because it is long.

3 You own it! If your name is on the paper, readers know to expect your thoughts, opinions, and ideas. You do not to remind your audience of your thinking by using: I think that I believe that I feel that in my opinion It is my belief that It is my opinion that I think cats make the worst pets. (wordy) Cats make the worst pets. (concise) In my opinion, caller I.D. is an invasion of privacy. (wordy) Caller I.D. is an invasion of privacy. (concise)

4 Classroom Activity pg 31 Working in pairs, or group of 3, review the phrases in… - Classroom Activity 1 - Which is concise or not ? - Why ???

5 Eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers Writers sometimes clog up their proses with one or more extra words or phrases that seem to determine narrowly or to modify the meaning of a noun but don't actually add to the meaning of the sentence. Writers sometimes clog up their proses with one or more extra words or phrases that seem to determine narrowly or to modify the meaning of a noun but don't actually add to the meaning of the sentence. Wordy Wordy Any particular type of dessert is fine with me. Any particular type of dessert is fine with me. Balancing the budget by Friday is an impossibility without some kind of extra help. Balancing the budget by Friday is an impossibility without some kind of extra help. More Concise More Concise Any dessert is fine with me. Any dessert is fine with me. Balancing the budget by Friday is impossible without extra help. Balancing the budget by Friday is impossible without extra help.

6 Preciseness: Prune those common words/phrases A list of some words and phrases that can often be pruned away to make sentences clearer: kind of kind of sort of sort of type of type of specific specific really really basically basically for all intents and purposes for all intents and purposes particular definitely particular definitely actually actually generally generally individual individualWordy For all intents and purposes, American industrial productivity generally depends on certain factors that are really more psychological in kind than of any given technological aspect. For all intents and purposes, American industrial productivity generally depends on certain factors that are really more psychological in kind than of any given technological aspect. More Concise American industrial productivity depends more on psychological than on technological factors. American industrial productivity depends more on psychological than on technological factors.

7 Change phrases into single words Using phrases to convey meaning that could be presented in a single word contributes to wordiness. Convert phrases into single words when possible. Look for prepositions to eliminate. Wordy The employee with ambition... The department showing the best performance... Jeff Converse, our chief of consulting, suggested at our last board meeting the installation of microfilm equipment in the department of data processing. More Concise The ambitious employee... The ambitious employee... The best-performing department... The best-performing department... At our last board meeting, Chief Consultant Jeff Converse suggested that we install microfilm equipment in the data processing department. At our last board meeting, Chief Consultant Jeff Converse suggested that we install microfilm equipment in the data processing department. As you edit, first find nominalizations that you can replace with verb phrases. As you edit, first find nominalizations that you can replace with verb phrases.

8 Change unnecessary that, who, and which clauses into phrases Using a clause to convey meaning that could be presented in a phrase or even a word contributes to wordiness. Convert modifying clauses into phrases or single words when possible. Wordy The report, The report, which was released recently... All applicants must... All applicants who are interested in the job must... The system... The system that is most efficient and accurate... More Concise The recently released report... The recently released report... All job applicants must... All job applicants must... The most efficient and accurate system... The most efficient and accurate system...

9 Remember… Effectiveness Description = Description = better, stronger words NOT more words! NOT more words!

10 The best description is vivid and concise… End of presentation.


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