1. Writing Workshop Feedback Protocol Let’s improve our writing!

2. Let’s Think 0 How does feedback and support from peers impact the writing process?

3. Writing Workshop Feedback Protocol 0 This is a time to offer specific feedback and assistance to the writing. 0 It is not a time for us to impose our own thoughts on the writing.

4. FEEDBACK SESSION 1.Writer’s Feedback (dilemma) [1-2 minutes]: Writer hands out copies of draft for the group. Writer states/explains the specific dilemma(s) that he/she is facing with the writing piece. Group members should write this dilemma somewhere on the paper. 2.Read Aloud [3-5 minutes]: Writer reads draft aloud or asks someone in the group to read it aloud. 3.Warm Feedback [2-3 minutes]: Participants comment on the strength of the piece. This has to be an authentic affirmation; it is not okay to say, “It’s good. I like it.” We also never use the word “but” in this phase of the feedback. 4.Cool Feedback [5-7 minutes]: Group discusses the writer’s dilemma- this should include specific suggestions or ideas. The writer should listen more than speak. The writer may clarify information, but it is most helpful for the writer to take notes on the discussion.

6. FEEDBACK SESSION 1.Writer’s Feedback (dilemma) [1-2 minutes]: Writer hands out copies of draft for the group. Writer states/explains the specific dilemma(s) that he/she is facing with the writing piece. Group members should write this dilemma somewhere on the paper. 2.Read Aloud [3-5 minutes]: Writer reads draft aloud or asks someone in the group to read it aloud. 3.Warm Feedback [2-3 minutes]: Participants comment on the strength of the piece. This has to be an authentic affirmation; it is not okay to say, “It’s good. I like it.” We also never use the word “but” in this phase of the feedback. 4.Cool Feedback [5-7 minutes]: Group discusses the writer’s dilemma- this should include specific suggestions or ideas. The writer should listen more than speak. The writer may clarify information, but it is most helpful for the writer to take notes on the discussion.

7. Model Example Is anything truly perfect, especially if one thing is perfect to one person, but not to another? In The Giver, a science fiction novel by Lois Lowry, a potential filled boy named Jonas learns how perfect his world actually is. Freedom is the path of life an individual takes, and the possibilities an individual chooses no one should be able to limit or control. In the book, peoples’ path of life is chosen for them. An example of this is, “In a firm, commanding voice she announced, ‘Jonas has been selected to be our next Receiver of Memory’” (Lowry, 57). In the story, people’s jobs are chosen for themselves. Jonas is an example of this; he was chosen to become the next Giver, and he could never change that.

8. FEEDBACK SESSION 1.Writer’s Feedback (dilemma) [1-2 minutes]: Writer hands out copies of draft for the group. Writer states/explains the specific dilemma(s) that he/she is facing with the writing piece. Group members should write this dilemma somewhere on the paper. 2.Read Aloud [3-5 minutes]: Writer reads draft aloud or asks someone in the group to read it aloud. 3.Warm Feedback [2-3 minutes]: Participants comment on the strength of the piece. This has to be an authentic affirmation; it is not okay to say, “It’s good. I like it.” We also never use the word “but” in this phase of the feedback. 4.Cool Feedback [5-7 minutes]: Group discusses the writer’s dilemma- this should include specific suggestions or ideas. The writer should listen more than speak. The writer may clarify information, but it is most helpful for the writer to take notes on the discussion.

9. Is anything truly perfect, especially if one thing is perfect to one person, but not to another? In The Giver, a science fiction novel by Lois Lowry, a potential filled boy named Jonas learns how perfect his world actually is. Freedom is the path of life an individual takes, and the possibilities an individual chooses no one should be able to limit or control. In the book, peoples’ path of life is chosen for them. An example of this is, “In a firm, commanding voice she announced, ‘Jonas has been selected to be our next Receiver of Memory’” (Lowry 57). In the story, people’s jobs are chosen for themselves. Jonas is an example of this; he was chosen to become the next Giver, and he could never change that. Dilemma: organization- engaging introduction; content and development- evidence and reasoning connecting to claim Strength: Good strong thesis- it’s apparent to the reader what you are going to prove; it’s a definitive claim with no person pronouns.

10. FEEDBACK SESSION 1.Writer’s Feedback (dilemma) [1-2 minutes]: Writer hands out copies of draft for the group. Writer states/explains the specific dilemma(s) that he/she is facing with the writing piece. Group members should write this dilemma somewhere on the paper. 2.Read Aloud [3-5 minutes]: Writer reads draft aloud or asks someone in the group to read it aloud. 3.Warm Feedback [2-3 minutes]: Participants comment on the strength of the piece. This has to be an authentic affirmation; it is not okay to say, “It’s good. I like it.” We also never use the word “but” in this phase of the feedback. 4.Cool Feedback [5-7 minutes]: Group discusses the writer’s dilemma- this should include specific suggestions or ideas. The writer should listen more than speak. The writer may clarify information, but it is most helpful for the writer to take notes on the discussion.

11. Is anything truly perfect, especially if one thing is perfect to one person, but not to another? In The Giver, a science fiction novel by Lois Lowry, a potential filled boy named Jonas learns how perfect his world actually is. Freedom is the path of life an individual takes, and the possibilities an individual chooses no one should be able to limit or control. In the book, peoples’ path of life is chosen for them. An example of this is, “In a firm, commanding voice she announced, ‘Jonas has been selected to be our next Receiver of Memory’” (Lowry 57). In the story, people’s jobs are chosen for themselves. Jonas is an example of this; he was chosen to become the next Giver, and he could never change that. Dilemma: organization- engaging introduction; content and development- evidence and reasoning connecting to claim Feedback: Consider choosing another lead to capture the attention of your reader. Using questions is not as engaging as dialogue or a specific quote. Might want to add some background information so your reader understands more about the novel and the character you will be discussing in the paper. Always assume your reader knows very little about your topic. Think about how your evidence and elaboration must prove your claim. Is there another way you can enhance your elaboration so that it ties back to your thesis.

12. FEEDBACK SESSION 5. Response [2-3 minutes]: Writer responds to the feedback- he/she may talk about specific ideas or suggestions that were helpful or things that gave him/her something to think about; can also talk about what plans he/she has for the piece. 6.Loose Ends: Group members return the drafts to the writer, especially if they have made notes on the page. The writer thanks the group and offers to facilitate the next session.

13. Debrief and Reflect 0 Was this activity beneficial? 0 How is this type of feedback better or worse than the feedback we provide through Google Docs? 0 In what ways does this protocol helps us to see how we can become better writers? 0 What did you like most about this protocol? 0 What aspects would you change?

14. WNB: Self Reflection 0 Based on today’s protocol and the group discussion, what are two specific concepts or ideas you can incorporate into your draft to help you achieve your writing goal? What makes you say that? Justify your answer.