1. Essay Feedback

2. MLA Style Why we use it… How we use it…

3. What is MLA??? MLA stands for Modern Language Association

4. The Rules There are three rules you want to remember… 3

5. The Rules How many? I couldn’t hear you! (Ah! That’s why my hand is near my ear. I get it.)

6. The Rules 3!!!!

7. The Rules 1- Page number is in parentheses () and have no “page” or “pp” before the page number 2 – The period goes AFTER the page number (outside of the parentheses) 3 – Quotations longer than four lines when you type them have special formatting

8. Rule #1 Your text your text your text your text quotation quotation quotation quotation your text your text your text your text your text

9. Rule #1: period is after the page number The opening like of the books states, “The dog was lying on the grass in the middle of the lawn in front of the house. It looked as if it was running on its side, the way dogs run when they think they are chasing a cat in a dream. But the dog was not running or asleep. The dog was dead” (1). This opening sentence creates a dramatic tension in the first lines of the novel.

10. Rule #2: No “page” or “pp” Check it out!! The opening like of the books states, “The dog was lying on the grass in the middle of the lawn in front of the house. It looked as if it was running on its side, the way dogs run when they think they are chasing a cat in a dream. But the dog was not running or asleep. The dog was dead” (1). This opening sentence creates a dramatic tension in the first lines of the novel.

11. Well, that one is easy…

12. Rule #3: Long Quotations In The Lord of the Flies, William Golding uses foreshadowing to highlight the fine line between playful and harmful human behavior. Early in the book, the boys are exploring the island in search of the Beast and happen upon a group of large boulders on top of a large rock. “The others, waiting in the grass, saw Jack and Ralph unharmed and broke cover into the sunlight. They forgot the beast in the excitement of exploration. […] A knot of boys, making a great noise that [Ralph] had not noticed were heaving and pushing at a rock. As [Ralph] turned, the base cracked and the whole mass toppled into the sea so that a thunderous plume of spray leapt half-way up the cliff” (99). This quotation shows… WAIT! That quotation is so long…

13. Rule #3: Long Quotations In The Lord of the Flies, William Golding uses foreshadowing to highlight the fine line between playful and harmful human behavior. Early in the book, the boys are exploring the island in search of the Beast and happen upon a group of large boulders on top of a large rock. “The others, waiting in the grass, saw Jack and Ralph unharmed and broke cover into the sunlight. They forgot the beast in the excitement of exploration. […] A knot of boys, making a great noise that [Ralph] had not noticed were heaving and pushing at a rock. As [Ralph] turned, the base cracked and the whole mass toppled into the sea so that a thunderous plume of spray leapt half-way up the cliff” (99). This quotation shows… Four times! Notice: It is more than 4 lines long when I type it out so I need to…

14. Rule #2: Long Quotations In The Lord of the Flies, William Golding uses foreshadowing to highlight the fine line between playful and harmful human behavior. Early in the book, the boys are exploring the island in search of the Beast and happen upon a group of large boulders on top of a large rock. They forgot the beast in the excitement of exploration. […] A knot of boys, making a great noise that [Ralph] had not noticed were heaving and pushing at a rock. As [Ralph] turned, the base cracked and the whole mass toppled into the sea so that a thunderous plume of spray leapt half-way up the cliff. (99) This quotation shows… Notice the indentation Wait! This is different! Notice the period is before the parenthesis Notice there are no quotation marks! Why? Because we use quotation marks to tell the readers, Hey! I’m a quotation! But when you indent it, you’re telling your reader that same thing… so you don’t need the quotation marks in addition.

15. The Rules Yup! 3 WAIT a MINUTE! So there are 3 rules for MLA citations, and there are 3 things to remember about citing quotations that are longer than 4 lines?

16. MLA Citation Rules 1) In-text Citations: The period goes AFTER the page number. 2) No “page” or “pp” before the page number 3) Quotations longer than four lines when you type them are separated and indented a) Indent one tab b) Place the period before the parenthesis c) Remove the quotation marks

17. When quoting dialogue… When you have a quotation with narration and dialogue, punctuate it like this: Convincing some of the boys to join him enabled Jack to finally wield some power over the someone. “Far off along the beach, Jack was standing before a small group of boys. He was looking brilliantly happy. ‘Hunting,’ he said. He sized them up” (123). This quotation shows… Use the regular quotation marks at the start and ending of the quotation and single apostrophes around the dialogue.

18. When you have multiple speakers… It becomes clear that Simon’s disappearance is not initially concerning to Piggy. “Where’s Simon?” [Ralph] “I don’t know.” [Piggy] “You don’t think he’s climbing the mountain?” Piggy broke into noisy laughter and took more fruit. “He might be.” He gulped his mouthful. “He’s cracked.” (122) This quotation shows… To show multiple speakers, format your quotation like the extra long quotations: remove the quotation marks, place the period before the page number, and indent. Here, the quotation marks signal dialogue. You can use brackets to add information that is necessary. Brackets signal to your reader that you are making changes to the writing.

19. Other common issues in your papers…

20. Symbols SUM – your topic sentence is summary and should be a claim Awk – this sentence is awkward. How can you reword it? (Try reading it aloud – that might help) WW – wrong word (perhaps spell check tricked you??)

21. Symbols Cliché – This is a cliché. Please be more creative with your diction! UMEF – use a more effective word TRANS – needs a transition here (see the list of transitions on my website)

22. Titles You underline OR italicize the title of a book. You do NOT put it in “quotation marks.” What do you put in quotation marks, you ask? Poem titles*Think smaller pieces “ “ Song titlesand bigger pieces Essays

23. And… Your essay better have a more creative title than Lord of the Flies Essay. Or I will fail you!! (Well, maybe not fail, but I won’t grade it until you give me a better title.)

24. When you need to cut parts of a quotation… Use [brackets] to show that you have removed text. If you use ellipses (…) to shorten a quotation you need to put [brackets] around them to show that these are your changes, not the writer’s writing.

25. GET – Bleh “Get” is a word that we use all the time, but it often it is not the most effective word. For example, I need to get my homework from my teacher. I need to collect my homework from my teacher.

26. GET – Fix these sentences Jack eventually gets the boys to try to murder Ralph. This also shows Ralph's urge to set up a structure that acts as a comfort to replace the fear about never getting home.

27. “Being” is another word which often leads to awkward and inarticulate sentences. For example: Hobbes' theory is being shown more clearly than Locke’s theory. Golding is showing Hobbes’ theory much more clearly than Locke’s theory. “Being” Awkward

28. Sometimes this awkwardness comes because you are using the passive voice. Passive Voice is when the “doer” of the verb is not the subject of the sentence. The ball was thrown. (subject) (verb) missing: who threw the ball? The ball was thrown by Joe. (subject) (verb) “Being” Awkward

29. Passive Voice is when the “doer” of the verb is not the subject of the sentence. The ball was thrown. (subject) (verb) missing: who threw the ball? If you can add “by ninjas” at the end of a sentence, you have a passive sentence. The ball was thrown by ninjas. (PASSIVE!) “Being” Awkward

30. “Being” is often used in passive sentences. The ball was being thrown around. (by ninjas!) OR This "beast" being introduced (by ninjas!) is threatening the stability of the community. Can you fix this? “Being” Awkward

31. “Being” can also be used as a form of “to be.” Though it may be grammatically accurate, it may still be inarticulate and awkward. To be able to testify against strong opinions is a good skill to have when being chief of a large group of people. How would you fix this? “Being” Awkward